Pain
by justabandgeek
Summary: Lovino has been bullied ever since he was a small child. One day, a certain Spaniard shows up at school and things start to change.
1. Chapter 1: Hatred

Chapter 1: Hatred

~Lovino's POV~

I run my hand through my hair, looking at myself in the mirror. What was it about me that everyone hated? I had light brown hair, dark brown eyes, olive skin… What was it?

I sigh, sitting my knife under the sink and wrapping my forearms up with white medical tape. I pull my sweatshirt over my head, looking into the mirror one last time before leaving the safety of my bathroom. I walk down the stairs, grabbing my black backpack and slinging it over my shoulder.

Feliciano looks up from his spot next to his boyfriend, giving me a happy smile. "Ciao, Lovi! Look who came to visit!" he chirps.

I nod, tossing him his backpack. "It's time for school." I walk out the door, my mood getting darker and more upset as my brother and Ludwig follow me.

They laughed and cooed about how 'cute' each other was or telling the other how much they loved each other. By the time we get to school, I feel like shit.

I take a deep breath, putting up my defenses, and walking to my first class. I sit down, scanning the room cautiously. I lock my shoulders in place, trying to look headstrong and brave.

I flinch as someone pulls out the chair next to me and takes a seat. I look at him from the corner of my eye, shaking a little. I'd never seen him before, but he was talking with Francis and Gilbert. They were the two bullies that were always finding new ways to hurt me or make me think badly about myself.

Francis kicks the back of my chair. "Hey! I'm talking to you, idiot!"

I turn slowly. "Sorry…" I mumble, clenching my fists in an attempt to stop shaking.

"Antonio, this is our idiot." He introduces with a smirk.

I look down. "My name is Lovino… I'm not an idiot…"

Francis growls, rewarding me with a punch to the lip. I hold my split lip, forcing back tears. Francis chuckles. "How many times do I have to remind you not to talk back to me?" he turns back to Antonio. "I trust that you and we will become great friends."

I turn back around, letting a few tears fall as blood starts to fill my mouth.

~PAGE BREAK~

The final bell rings, indicating the end of the school day. I hurry to my locker, shoving my books into my backpack as quickly as I could. I squeak as a hand is placed on my shoulder.

"Lovino, right?" a Spanish accent asks from behind me.

"Y-yeah…? Why?" I turn to Antonio, not making eye contact.

"Oh, well I know Francis and Gilbert don't like you very much, but I didn't think it was very nice how they treated you. Maybe you'd like to come over to play some video games?"

I look up into his shining green eyes, not believing this for a second. "No." I spat. "I don't want to be tricked again. I've fallen for the ole 'I'm sorry, want to come over?' trick three times. I'm not falling for it a fourth." I run away, going home as quickly as I could.

I slam my bedroom door, falling down and crying into my knees. I continue to sob until I hear the front door open. I rub my eyes, sucking up my sadness and standing back up.

"Lovi! Your friend is here!" Feliciano shouts up the stairs.

My… Friend? I walk out of my room, scowling as I catch sight of Antonio. He waves, coming up. He smiles at me, ruffling my hair. I flinch away from his hand, fear filling my eyes for a moment.

"Hola, Lovi!"

I back up against the wall, watching him with terror. I close my eyes tightly as he moves toward me.

He touches my cheek carefully, pulling me into a hug. "I told you," he whispers. "I'm not out to hurt you like the others. I want to be your friend."

I let out an involuntary whimper as I shake like a timid puppy. I fall down when he lets go, scooting into the corner and curling up. "N-no one is s-supposed to be m-my fr-friend… I'm a mi-mistake…"

He sits next to me, giving me some space. "Well, I'm going to be your friend." He chuckles, and I can see the friendliness sparkling in his eyes.

"Really? Truthfully?" I ask quietly.

He nods with a toothy smile. "Si!"

Something floods through me that I'd never experienced before. It was warm, comforting even… It was happiness. I'd never known how wonderful this sensation was… It was beautiful, and I loved it.

I give him a slight smile, testing it out. Slowly, my smile widens, and I give him a hug. I start to cry into his shoulder out of happiness and sadness.

He hugs back, rubbing my back to calm me down. "Shh… It's okay…"

"I've never had a friend before." I hiccup. "Ever since I was little, everyone made fun of me and hurt me… I-I…" I trail off, letting go. "Sorry…" I mutter. "I should've known. I'm such an idiot!" I scream, jabbing my finger at the front door.

Ludwig was here, with Gilbert and Francis. I stand up, giving Antonio the most hateful look I could muster. "I should've known… No one is my friend. No one will ever think of me more than just a punching bag. It will always be that way…" I turn to run back to my room, running into Gilbert.

"What were you saying?" he asks.

"Nothing." I duck under his fist, making a bee-line for the bathroom instead. I lock the door, and pull off my sweatshirt. I tear off the bandages from my arms. I grab the knife, holding it to my chest. I stare at my tear-stained cheeks, split lip, and then I listen to the cruel words and banging from the other side of the door.

I drive the knife into my chest, yowling in agony. I smile as I fall down and my blood surrounds me. I was going to die. I wasn't going to be in physical or emotional pain anymore. I would be happy for real this time.

Black spots start to fill my vision, and the last think I see is the door shattering and Antonios horrified expression. He scoops me into his arms, and then everything ends.


	2. Chapter 2: Regret

Chapter 2: Regret

~Antonio's POV~

It had been about four weeks since Lovino had tried to kill himself in his bathroom. Lovino had yet to have woken up from his sleep, and it was really worrying me. The afternoon that he had attempted suicide, I had carried him to the hospital, running on pure adrenaline. The doctors had told me that the knife had barely scraped his heart. He had some internal bleeding, but he was scheduled for surgery later that day.

I look up as Feliciano sniffles and stands up. "L-Lovi is lucky to have you as a friend… Yo-you saved his life… He could've… Died…" he chokes on his tears.

I smile wryly at the comment. Lovino hated me. I didn't lead Francis and Gilbert to his house; they simply came along with Ludwig. But I knew that he wouldn't believe a word I said after that. He was lonely and scared, and he was afraid that if he started to open up to someone, they would think he was stupid or useless.

I am shocked out of my thoughts as the heart-rate monitor speeds up. I look down at Lovino, overjoyed to see his eyes start to open. But… They weren't filled with relief… They were full of hatred. Anger.

"NO!" he screeches. "I WAS SUPPOSED TO DIE!"

My eyes widen as his rage gets worse and worse. He starts tearing out the needles and heart monitor, causing the machines to make shrill monotone noises in an attempt to alert the doctors and nurses something was wrong.

Nurses flood the room in a panic, but are relieved to see that their patient was still alive. Most of them leave, and a pair of nurses work together to calm down Lovino and put his IV's back in their rightful places.

"We are putting a heavy dose of morpheme in his IV to soothe the pain and calm him down a bit." One of the nurses explains calmly.

I nod a little, still frozen in shock that Lovino acted like he did. Once they leave, I force myself out of my chair and walk over to Lovino's bed. "Hola, amigo." I speak softly.

He looks up, eyes foggy because of the morpheme running through his veins. "Antonio?" he pauses for a moment, and then his jaw locks. "I trusted you… I thought that you were different…" he looks away, forcing himself not to let the tears fall that were threatening to fall from the corners of his eyes.

I sigh. "Hear me out, Lovino…"

He shoots me a piercing glare. "Why should I?"

"I'm your friend!"

He laughs sourly, looking at me with a pained expression. "That's a fucking hilarious joke. Now fuck off." He growls, crossing his arms.

I sigh once again. "I need to tell you what really happened that afternoon…"

He is silent, so I take my chance to tell him exactly what happened and why Francis and Gilbert showed up that day. He continues to be silent, not acknowledging that I explained what happened.

"Lovi?" I ask softly.

"Don't you dare call me that."

Feliciano comes into the room, eyes sparkling when he sees that his brother is awake. He rushes over, and hugs Lovino tightly. "You're okay, big brother!" he chirps happily, smiling widely. "I was afraid you were never going to wake up!"

Lovino scoffs. "How long was I out, anyway?"

"About four weeks now," Feliciano and I say simultaneously.

"That long…?" He is shocked.

The door to the room opens, and Lovino and Feliciano's grandfather walk in. "I hear that you tried to kill yourself, Lovino Vargas." He pauses, shaking his head in disbelief. "I'm so ashamed of you…"

**A.N.: I'm sorry that this chapter is so short, I was limited with time today, but I promise that the next chapter will make up for this wimpy one.**


End file.
